There is an expression which covers the work we’re talking about here: “soul retrieval”.
Yes, it sounds dramatic, doesn’t it? But in truth almost everyone of us, somewhere along the line, lost part of our soul.
Many people, both women and men, can feel that loss. They know that somewhere along the path of life they lost piece of their authenticity – a part of themselves.
If you can’t put your finger on what that part of you was or where it disappeared to, then now is the time to find out!
What Is Missing From your Soul?
As a woman, it’s very likely that the part of you which is missing is your deep feminine energy, the essence of your femininity.
You might have observed how feminine energy is reaching out into our society. Perhaps this is the collective unconscious telling us that feminine energy is the only way the world is going to be healed and transformed.
For, without blaming the masculine, it’s fair to say that most of the destruction going on in the world is the product of excessive masculine energy and a lack of feminine energy. We have, man and woman, together created this sorry state of affairs. And now we must restore feminine energy to the world.
Starting, perhaps, in our pleasing relationships with men.
Masculine Energy Is Dominant:
It Needs To Be Balanced By The Divine Feminine
Think of how the masculine embodies qualities like competition, determination, dominance, decisiveness, overconfidence, insensitivity to world and the environment.
Of course these traits are in both men and women. And of course women can benefit from having some of this masculine energy as part of their personality.
But the problem is that we are out of balance. People in almost every country (and that includes countries like the United States and Japan) associate qualities like happiness, success, morality and ethics with the feminine.
We have always associated things like nurturing and empathy as well as kindness, generativity, and nurturing support with the feminine.
But there are other traits which we can identify as emerging with the feminine: leadership, success, ethics, kindness, and collaboration.
And of course this is very necessary, for our success both collectively and individually. We can’t go on as we are, being driven further and further apart by conflict.
And so could it be that women need to become leaders? Leaders who show men how to come back into balance with the feminine (and as they do so, to reject the old ways of dominance and competition)?
Yes! And one of the easiest ways by which women can enable this transformation to take place is for them to step fully into the power of their own divine feminine energy.
How To Step Into The Divine Feminine
Whatever the theory masculinity and femininity, if you are a woman who wants to step into her deepest femininity and experience the Divine Feminine for herself, you may well be asking: “How do I step into the Divine Feminine?”
What does that feminine power look like? And how can you fully embody that feminine power for yourself?
10 Ways To Embody the Feminine
I think it’s obvious that racing around frantically, trying to do a hundred different things at once is not nurturing to the soul, and it’s certainly not a way to connect with yourself or other people.
And when you have time and space to look inward, you can get a sense of what your power looks like and how it might work in the world.
So find a way of creating some space for yourself. If you’re not a good at setting boundaries, you can use this as an exercise to learn how to set boundaries so you get time for reflection without interruption.
And once you have time and space in which you can slow down, you can give yourself the gift of renewed connection with yourself.
But make no mistake – it can be difficult to tune in with yourself after you’ve spent a lifetime serving others.
And it can be difficult to quiet your mind and get in touch with the deepest messages coming from the deepest, most intuitive parts of you. Yet intuition is one of the most profoundly feminine traits of all.
Meditation, reflection, the invocation of energy from the world around you: no matter what you do, sit quietly in a meditative state for up to 30 minutes a day. That way, you will (re-)awaken the feminine essence of your being and intuition.
And if you can’t manage 30 minutes, make it 5 minutes – but just do it.
Identify Your Connection With The universal Source
You don’t have to believe in God or a Higher Power to know that there is something bigger than you in the universe!
Your deepest subconscious mind has a connection to the universe – and it is this connection from where your power ultimately comes. And, this is the source of your intuition, too.
From your ability to manifest reality, to your ability to sense what your man is thinking, your intuition is a power source.
Now, you might be thinking that your power source is your determination, your courage, and perhaps even your masculine energy.
And I agree – those qualities can be a power source. But when women begin to behave as men do in politics or business, they lose an element of themselves: they stop being authentically feminine.
It is not possible for a woman to stand fully in her femininity if she is encapsulating masculine energy as a leader in business or society.
But that may not matter if she’s in touch with her feminine energy and she’s using it to soften her masculine energy.
By using her intuition, her skills of connection, nurturing, support, vulnerability and by being in her feminine flow, she can still maintain her feminine self.
You see, it’s the complete denial, suppression, or loss of femininity which is so damaging to women, and to men, and to the world.
So where is your power coming from? Your masculine energy? If so, could you get it instead from being in your feminine flow?
Which brings us on to the next issue:
Consider which traits you really need
You know how you’re showing up. You don’t need to be told. You are a woman. You know exactly which parts of you are authentic and which are not.
And all these parts are welcome. They are there for a very good reason (only you know why).
And perhaps now the time has come for you to choose the traits and qualities which will serve you best.
Feminine traits are not weak, contrary to the impression that certain misguided men have given in recent times.
Indeed, feminine traits and qualities such as compassion, nurturing, vulnerability, creativity and empathy, are traits that can save the world. (See a more extensive list at the bottom of the page.)
Only you can decide how much you need masculine qualities such as dominance, competitiveness, leadership, independence and authority.
But bear in mind that for a woman to lose connection with these important feminine traits – perhaps none more important than creativity – can denature her to such an extent that she no longer knows who she truly is.
Read our article on being a queen to find out more about this. But in either case, whether you feel you’re too masculine or too feminine, choose to be who you are (and what you do) with conscious awareness.
Own All Aspects of Yourself
It’s extraordinary how men and women alike can reject the feminine. It’s a cultural thing: it’s seen as weak.
But feminine energy is part of a change in both our society and the world at large. And by owning all aspects of yourself, both masculine and feminine, and making the right kind of energy dominant in your Queendom, you can stand in your power.
Make the choice now: stand in your power by bringing back to yourself the parts of yourself which you have repressed and denied.
Check out Those Limiting Beliefs
The patriarchy has devalued and suppressed feminine energy. And women have swallowed this whole…..
How many times have you said to yourself something like “He/she won’t like me if I’m too weak and soft?”
Or how many times have you told yourself “If I’m feminine, I’ll get walked all over or taken advantage of”?
You might even told yourself that you can’t be in business and feminine at the same time.
But all you have to do to change this programming is catch these beliefs consciously, and then examine them to see if they’re true.
Once you’ve identified these stories as your limiting beliefs, you can examine them – and with a process of self-examination, you can start to change them.
If they’re particularly sticky ones you might want to use some form of interventionist therapy such as woman’s work or shadow work, perhaps, to deal with them .
The feminine energy is a sensual, sensuous energy. You know this. You know what you need to meet this need. Give it to yourself!
Massage, yoga, time in nature, meditation, aromatherapy, reflexology… all of these are therapies which can nurture and support feminine energy.
Surrender to your vulnerability, and allow yourself to restore your spirit with the appropriate therapy or self-care.
(And encourage the men around you, the men who perhaps imbue you with a need to know how to please a man, to do the same. It can only benefit them to be more aware of their own inner feminine.)
Speak Your Truth
One of the hardest things for anyone – man or woman – is to live a life of authenticity and integrity.
I guess, however, men are probably more true to themselves than women. Women will sacrifice themselves and their power to follow the demands of others.
And you sacrifice your power every time you fail to speak your truth.
Your feminine power lies in speaking from a place of heart-centeredness. So what if people don’t like it? (And now’s the time to stop saying sorry so often. You don’t need to apologize for who you are.)
Look At Your Relationships
It’s easy to compromise our standards – we all know that.
Regrettably, one area where it’s very natural for women to compromise is in romantic relationships.
Are you spending all your time pleasing your man?
Have you considered how masculine that tendency is, how goal oriented? How little it takes you into consideration?
Would it be possible, do you think, for you to be true to yourself by standing more firmly and clearly in your feminine power AND at the same time still know how to please your man? Well, truth is, it would be even easier
Most men want a woman who is in her powerful feminine energy. That way she can draw him into his own masculine power and so create passion. But note that this is a natural and balanced coming together of man and woman.
If you’re doing a job which requires you to stand in your masculine energy, your partner may feel uncertain of his place and even disempowered as a man.
When you step more fully into your feminine you drive your man more firmly into his masculine, so that you both know exactly where you stand and what energy you’re showing up in.
As you probably know, at some deep level, if you care to allow yourself to know it, one of the most powerful ways to re-establish your feminine power is to be creative.
When did you last create something that had no purpose other than to give you joy?
Maybe art, painting, needlework, cooking food by inspiration as part of your nurturing gift to your family, taking photographs, making something, writing something, dancing… whatever you need as a woman to tap into your creative ability and power, it’s calling out to you to give it attention. And as soon as you answer that call, your femininity will unfold in a beautiful way.
So, How To Do This?
Find a group of women with whom you can meet on a regular basis, and preferably not in the guise of something else like a book club.
Make it an overtly feminine gathering if you can – perhaps a sweat lodge once a month, or a celebration of the full moon and the new moon.
Or maybe just a talking circle where you can hear each other’s stories from the heart and speak from the heart.
The art of gathering together as women has been lost. That’s sad. It’s a great way of nurturing each other and giving your community, your friends, and your relatives the time and energy required for your essential feminine (or masculine) to rise within you.
We all need to make such sharing of time and energy important.
Other things you can do? You could also carry out some sacred feminine practices: create an altar in your house decorated with things that are significant to you.
Do some meditation, chant, walk, attend to your crystals, divination, light a candle, sing, dance – in short, do whatever gives you the slightest indication that you’re moving towards the feminine.
All of these things (and many more) will bring you home to the essence of your feminine power. You know what you need to do. Go do it!
Finally, if necessary go to a feminine development workshop so that you can really understand what it means to get into your feminine energy and to spend time with women who are in their feminine energy.
Don’t hide your feelings: be more expressive and uncommunicative.
Think of small acts which will nudge you move you slowly towards your feminine energy.
Finally, more than anything else bring your feminine and masculine traits into balance!